I was looking at pictures of Barcelona on Facebook yesterday that someone else posted, and I realized how far away or maybe long ago my memories of my life there felt. It has only been 1.5 months but I feel like it has been forever. I don’t spend much time thinking about Barcelona anymore. After I came back from the States, I think I had a much harder time settling back into my life in Germany. I think that may have been because I did enjoy living in the States more than I did living in Spain, but also due to how my life in Germany was before I left and after I came back.

Moving to the States was like a much-needed break from my life in Germany, especially in Heidelberg. It gave me a year to come to terms with some things that had happened in Heidelberg, and to come to terms with myself. I wasn’t a very happy person throughout the first two years of university, and Norman provided a sort of escape for me.

After I got back, things really got much better, I had a new perspective on life, and while it felt like starting over again in Heidelberg, this time it went really well, I was able to take the positivity of my life in Norman back to Heidelberg. I think that is part of why I missed Norman so much. It was really the beginning of a much better life for myself.

Now when I went to Spain, while it was nice to get a break from small-town life, I didn’t need it so much. I had a job I liked, school was going better, I had good friends. Barcelona was like putting my life in Heidelberg on hold for a year. It was a great experience, but it simply wasn’t as important to me as Norman was.

And since I’ve been back from Spain, I just feel great here. I am doing an internship. I am spending the summer in Munich, my hometown and a place I see with different eyes, that I know to appreciate now after not having lived here for so long. I have found a place to live in Heidelberg, I will get my job back, and I [most likely] have an internship secured for my next semester break. I have good friends. I feel like everything is falling into place, I am finding my spot in life, and I am content with what I have.

There is simply no need to miss the past because I am happy with the present. Not everything is perfect, of course, whose life is? But I am content with the now and excited about the next few months. I feel like the older I get, the more comfortable I am with myself as a person. I am not happy with everything about myself, but I am proud of my achievements, I am more outgoing, I know I deserve good things, I am willing to work for them, and I appreciate what I have. I feel like I am slowly finding my place in the world. There is no need to live in the past, and while I will never be the kind of person who lives purely in the moment [I do like to plan, to know where I will be in a few months], I am enjoying my life right now.

So, ummm … here I was filling out paperwork for my internship. I wanted to make sure I would not lie [unconsciously], so I asked my mom, if she still had Italian citizenship [from her first marriage]. She said, well she doesn’t know, it’s been so long. So I asked her if she ever gave it up. She said, no. Meaning she still is an Italian citizen. Which was the point when I started looking into how Italian citizenship is passed on to your kids. I just called someone at the Italian consulate in Munich. The guy there told me that I indeed appear to be an Italian citizen. I was just never registered but I can do that now. It doesn’t even sound all that complicated. This is so weird. I mean, I don’t have a single drop of Italian blood in me, but apparently I am Italian. Maybe I should really try to learn Italian properly now?! Dual citizenship will not really make any difference for me right now, but it might be useful at some point.

In other news, I called the university housing office again, and I was offered a room in a shared apartment. I was going to go to Heidelberg to find an apartment this upcoming weekend. And I was set on not sharing an apartment anymore. But? Rent in Heidelberg is so expensive! And I really don’t feel like wasting an entire weekend looking for an apartment I may or may not find. And I will not have to deal with any bills as all utilities are included. Besides, it will probably save my parents a good €200 / month. And while I wanted to live by myself, I am no idiot without a [financial] conscience. I will also have the option to apply to move [into a single apartment] after a semester [keyword apply]. So? I accepted. I will be living in the building I applied for, the International House, which is a new residence building, I will share an apartment with three others, and I will not be going to Heidelberg this weekend. My rental contract starts on September 1st, so I might move soon, but I will not be living there until October as I am working here until September 30th. I figure if it doesn’t work out, I can still move after one semester, and at least I will be in Heidelberg to find an apartment which will be easier and cheaper. And I might even end up enjoying living on campus, something I haven’t done since the States [which was technically off-campus anyway].

Edit: What a day! I just got an e-mail from my former supervisor at the bookstore in Heidelberg, and I will be able to work there again! I am not going to do the exact same thing but I’ll be back at the bookstore in October! Sweet! So far, Monday is rocking my socks off!

• I received a reply about the internship I applied for. You know, that one … [sorry if you don't know what I am talking about, you should read my protected posts]. I just sent my application on Thursday, and already got an invite for an interview. It all sounds so promising. I really really really want it to work out, it would be amazing!
• I signed up for a few classes for next semester already. The highlight? A class on Ian McEwan’s Atonement and On Chesil Beach. I finally ordered the first one on DVD and the book of the latter. Perfect. Excuse.
• I read Eclipse yesterday. I need help. 25 should be too old to obsess over fictional vampires one fictional vampire that are is way too perfect to ever be real [besides the fact that he's a vampire]. I’ll only be disappointed to find that men? Really aren’t that perfect. Damn! Only a few days until the fourth book comes out, can’t wait!
• It is hot outside. And even hotter in the office. I feel like my brain is mushy and I am incompetent this week. I cannot wait for it to be over. No one seems to be working either, they’re all off sick or on vacation. I miss my co-workers!
• I love making new friends. I really hit it off with another girl [Elisabeth] at Jenn’s wedding. I think I may not be so socially awkward after all. Only with guys. Looking forward to hanging out with her when I am back in Heidelberg. Two new friends in a month is pretty awesome!
• Apparently people [Americans] cannot tell that I am German when I speak English. Which is great! But apparently my German is starting to sound American. Which may be not so great. At the wedding I asked a German waiter in German where the restroom was and he replied in English. Wtf? Elisabeth also said that my German sounded American [intonation-wise and such].
• Jenn’s wedding was great, Jenn was beautiful and you could just tell how much her husband adores her. I will post pictures later. [They are already up on Flickr and Facebook, though.] I think I may want to get married at a castle too, just as soon as I’ve found my Edward Cullen Prince Charming.
• Boxes are all up in the attic. Now I will not have to worry about them for two months. Not sure how I will get everything back downstairs undamaged, though. I’ll ask my brother and maybe a friend of his to help me, because these boxes are heavy and the ladder up to the attic makes me shudder [on the inside] just looking at it. No way am I climbing up there.

I’ve been in Heidelberg since yesterday. Wednesday night I found out that the girl whose basement I left my stuff in [of course I asked her] said that I have to move my stuff. I then talked to her after I arrived yesterday, and she said I have two weeks to move it. Needless to say, I am a bit peeved. I can just move it up to the attic, but that is up two floors and then up the ladder that goes to the attic. And they [both the girl and my former landlord who first told me] have known this for weeks if not months, but didn’t tell me until 12 hours before I was leaving for Heidelberg. Of course I have to move it, it’s her basement, she needs it [and she does have a good reason, so I'm not complaining about that], she did me a huge favor by letting me leave my stuff there for a year without paying anything [though I did offer!], but then letting me know that last minute is inconsiderate, regardless of how nice it was of her in the first place. Now I have moved some stuff to the 2nd floor (up two floors) already, and luckily my friend Flora is going to help me tomorrow morning to move the rest and take everything up to the attic. But I did have to cancel my plans for tomorrow which sucks. But otherwise I would have to come back here again just to move some stuff up the attic next weekend and needless to say it would be a huge ordeal just to do that, stressful and expensive. So I hope everything will work out tomorrow and Flora and I will get everything done.

Anyway, on to more fun things. I met up with Flora yesterday, we went to Starbucks and got some coffee and chatted, and then took a walk down to the Neckar and along the river. It was really fun, and so nice to see her again. In the evening Sheela, Dani and I went to Mandy’s [a diner], and I had my usual burger and a milkshake, man, I did miss it, they are so much better than at McDonald’s.

Today I went to the housing office where the lady told me how my chances were of getting an apartment through university housing - very, very bad. No surprise there, though. She told me to call again in two weeks, but I think my dad and I will have to come back here in three weeks or so to find an apartment for me.

Right now I am at the university library because I wanted to check my e-mail and update my blog. I can get online on my phone at the house but typing on it takes forever. I also had some time to kill anyway, so I decided to stop by my former work again [I already did this morning but my supervisor wasn't there yet] to say hi to my former co-workers and ask if I could work there again in October. I don’t want to get overly excited yet, but it did sound like I would quite likely be able to work there again, possibly some other tasks than I used to, though. My supervisor told me she would talk to the store manager and let me know next week or the week after.

Sooo, I think I am off to the rehearsal dinner now. It starts in a little over an hour but I want to stop at Starbucks and have to go to the bank as well. Besides all the stress of unexpectedly having to move my stuff, I am having a good time here, though. The weather is amazing, it is sunny and warm, and it is good to see my friends again after such a long time.

Last weekend I finally got a chance to celebrate my birthday with a few friends here in Munich. Saturday evening we did a barbecue and then went out for drinks. It was a really fun time, and another food-filled weekend after my cousin’s wedding the weekend before. It was so nice to see my friends again too, as that was the first time I saw them since January [or in Julia's case, since February when she came to visit me in Barcelona].

And then there was that reception at the U.S. Consulate on Tuesday, which mostly meant more food. It was really interesting though, even just to get a chance to go to such an event, even though I was completely out of my league there [luckily I wasn't by myself]. How lucky am I to be given this chance just one week into my internship?!

This week I worked Monday to Wednesday, and on Wednesday, I went to look for a dress to wear at Jennifer’s wedding in Heidelberg in two weeks. I seriously tried on so many dresses, I think I must’ve tried on like 15, and I did not find one I really really liked. I went home at 8pm when stores closed [have to get used to those early closing times again], and was pretty frustrated. Also because I found lots of dresses that looked good except on me, so who do I blame? Me of course! But then, Thursday, I went downtown again and I only had to try on three dresses in one store [Zara] and ended up buying two of them within less than an hour. I was going to return one after deciding which one to keep with my mom’s and best friend’s help, but now I have decided to keep both. So now I have a pretty dress to wear for the wedding in Heidelberg, and I also got the wedding present on Thursday [and am quite happy with my choice]. I may have to get a purse to go with the shoes I am going to wear but other than that, I am all set.

I also bought the train tickets last week - I am going to be in Heidelberg from the 24th to the 27th of this month. The rehearsal dinner is on the 25th and the wedding the next evening, and I will hopefully be able to hang out with my friends there as well during those three days. I can’t wait, will be the first time to be there in almost a year and also that long to see most of my friends again. Good thing is that I am leaving on Thursday now, and won’t have to take any days off work because I wouldn’t be working Thursdays and Fridays anyway.

Speaking of, work is going really well, I enjoy working there, and my co-workers are still really nice! I actually stopped by my co-worker Sandra’s place on Friday after picking up a dress at someone’s house [for a polka dot dress night out next weekend - another dress that is beautiful but unfortunately this one's not mine, only borrowed] as it turned out they both lived in the same street. We just spent some time sitting on her balcony and chatting, it was really nice.

This weekend has been quiet though, I haven’t really been up to much, but that’s okay. I am still settling into the whole working routine. Even though I only work 20 hours a week, I am always really tired after work; I think I also still have to get used to getting up earlier than usual.

Well, I will probably actually try to go to bed now, wouldn’t it be something to actually get 8 hours of sleep before a work day for a change?